Posted by Mark A. Sadowski, economist & fable narrator, as a comment to the Econobrowser blog's analysis of the Heritage Foundation's model for Rep. Ryan's plan ("Implied Supply Side Elasticities from the Heritage CDA Simulations"):
Once upon a time a national government who had an only congressman named Rep. Ryan and a source of tax revenue named the US economy. And all they had to live on was the tax revenue the economy gave every year. But one year the US economy gave very little tax revenue and they didn’t know what to do.
"What shall we do, what shall we do?" said the government, wringing her hands.
"Cheer up, US government, I’ll go and get work somewhere," said Rep. Ryan.
"We’ve tried that before, and nobody would take you," said his government; "we must sell the US economy and with the money, start a international lobbying group, or something."
"All right, US government," says Rep. Ryan; "it’s market-day today, and I’ll soon sell the US economy, and then we’ll see what we can do."
So he took the US economy's halter in his hand, and off he started.
He hadn’t gone far when he met a funny-looking old right wing think tank, who said to him: "Good morning, Rep. Ryan."
"Good morning to you," said Rep. Ryan, and wondered how he knew his name.
"Well, Rep. Ryan, and where are you off to?" said the right wing think tank.
"I’m going to market to sell our economy here."
"Oh, you look the proper sort of chap to sell national economies," said the right wing think tank; "I wonder if you know how many supply elasticities make five."[I have to insert a dramatic pause here in Sadowski's narrative, as what follows is the funniest thing I've read in years. Get ready...]
"Two in each hand and one in your mouth," says Rep. Ryan, as sharp as a needle.[Think about it. Think congressman-as-cheapo-hooker offering a group rate for services. LOL & ROTFL]
"Right you are," said the right wing think tank, "and here they are, the very supply elasticities themselves," he went on, pulling out of his pocket a number of strange-looking supply elasticities. "As you are so sharp," says he, "I don’t mind doing a swap with you — your US economy for these supply elasticities."
"Jeepers!" says Rep. Ryan; "wouldn’t you like it?"
"Ah! you don’t know what these supply elasticities are," said the right wing think tank; "if you plant them overnight, by morning they grow right up to the sky."
"Really?" says Rep. Ryan; "you don’t say so."
"Yes, that is so, and if it doesn’t turn out to be true you can have your economy back."
"Right," says Rep. Ryan, and hands him over the US economy's halter and pockets the supply elasticities.
Back goes Rep. Ryan to congress, and as he hadn’t gone very far it wasn’t dusk by the time he got to his congressional desk.
"Back already, Paul?" said his government; "I see you haven’t got the US economy, so you’ve sold her. How much did you get for her?"
"You’ll never guess, US government," says Rep. Ryan.
"No, you don’t say so. Good boy! Five trillion dollars, ten, fifteen, no, it can’t be twenty."
"I told you you couldn’t guess. What do you say to these supply elasticities; they’re magical, plant them overnight and —"
Well to make a long story short the moral of the story is... What moral?
After all, how can a story about a congressman who is fooled into taking magic supply elasticities, trespasses on someone else's property, commits burglary, and then kills him, offer a "moral lesson"?
Posted by: Mark A. Sadowski at April 8, 2011 02:56 PM
Almost made me snort my morning coffee out my nose!
I stopped short at the mental image of Rep. Ryan strapping on an oversized dildo-belt that he intends to thrust into the gaping orifices of the American public.